Why I Paint? It's Not What You Might Think

Why DO I paint? Clarity, searching, the art world asks for consistency. The only thing that feels consistent to me is the ebb and flow of the search. I woke from a dream this morning, as usual. With it the thought of my son and granddaughter I haven’t seen in years.  

Stirring my coffee, I head for the studio with my journal to unravel the dream. Facing the weekend’s paintings, I search for meaning.

detail, Hot Pink Goddess textile art

Dream: I am serving something from a challis, a wide challis with a very tall stem. The challis is filled with water chestnuts or stones, river stones, some dark and light.  I am serving an Asian man, “Are you sure you want some of this?” I ask. There is not enough olive oil ~ I’ll get more olive oil, I pour more olive oil, into the challis ~ and go back to serving the Asian man.  “Do you have enough on your plate?” 

The unraveling begins before I can get the dream written.

Symbols jump out with suggestions. 

Olive Oil, 'I’ll live' oils, paintings to keep me alive,  

chalis, What I saw in the dream was a chalice, but what I wrote was chalis. Misspelling or the calligraphy of my handwriting suggests several meanings. Interpreting the visual, chalice represents the element of water, the feminine divine, and the Eucharist.

Interpreting the double meaning revealed in my handwriting, challis is a lightweight woven fabric with a soft drape used for dresses, blouses, scarves, and wraps. Traditionally made with silk and wool interwoven, matte finish. Designs of florals, paisely, or geometrics are woven or printed.  

Stones, river stones, washed up edge, some dark, some light, the river runs through it/her

How much do I have to serve?

My way of coping with the way it is ~

The Asian man wants more. my son is the Asian man, married to a Korean woman, 

water chesnuts in olive oil, chess, a game of waiting for the other person to make his move, strategy, checkmate, being cornered, out of moves, I gave up my queen, I gave up being the queen. I gave up being grammy ~ queen of my family. There is nothing for me to do, no more moves.

Unless ~ you take back being queen, MY queen. I Take back MY Queen. There’s no game without the queen. If you’re not queen, you can’t be queen of hearts.

It’s your next move. What does the queen do next? Keep serving the Asian man with oilive oil and chessnuts or take back the game~

Stand up. Take your place in the game. Make your move. You can go anywhere ~ straight, diagonally, all across the board. I am the white queen.

We don’t have to play chess. We can play checkers ~ it’s much faster ~ and you can jump, all pieces are equal. No pawns. Grandchildren were pawns in chess. In checkers, they are equally important, check in, play.

I am queen of hearts. I take back my role in this family. Queen of hearts serves cupcakes. But she’s out of practice, out of touch. She needs to get back in the game. Listen.

Find out how to be queen. Send them a txt message, a picture, a question, something to get them talking. Listen.  

Interpreting Art & Dreams

Interwoven Jewels

In a previous dream I envisioned my Interwoven Series paintings as textiles for home decor, wall coverings, fabrics. In this dream, I see also challis wrapped around my friends, in a warp and weft of vibrant colors.

Hot Pink Goddess textile art

Looking at the dream and art together opens a portal. Two pieces were inspired by rooftop gardens of Venice. Structure of buildings, patterns of light and shadow, warm and cool interlace with organic flora. As the paintings progress, another inspiration overlays with the meadow theme of interweaving organic structure with man-made. 

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It’s All About Color: Color Moves Creative Energy

Morning Prayer

Creating Balance: Jewel or Pastel? One painting feels deep, jewel tones ~ the other pastel.  in crimson, orange, yellow, interweave with purple, blend to neutral greens, and occasionally pop with teal. The other muted with soft pastels, pinks, greens, corals, lavenders, and gentle ochre. I really can’t paint one or the other exclusively, it’s really about balance.

The River Flows Up

River Flows Up

Harmony for Flourishing: Heart Colors Surrounded by Jewels. A third painting, a landscape takes on a vibrant green lime meadow with a turquoise sky. Hot pink, coral, vermilion, a river runs through the center. Not horizontally but up through the middle of the composition. I was trying to put the river up near the horizon, off in the distance. Then I began to feel it centered in the foreground. 

Now it’s altered its course. And so have I. As soon as I did, the flow opened up and the white calligraphic oil paint stick danced right through the center of the heartland.

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